Fi's Travels: Cinderella and her prince charming

Er....

I'm fast running out of things to say! Well, constructive things anyway.

Unconstructively I can tell you that I had a 'sober chat' with Adam about the issues raised in the previous post (well, last but one) and... wait for it... he barely even remembered saying what he did!! It was only the memory of me crying that prompted recognition.

That made it a bit of an awkward chat. He wasn't sure what I wanted to say, or hear... and I asked what he was thinking and he just said that we should take it as it comes really... see if I can make it back here after being in the UK again, see if it works once I'm back here again, and then re-evaluate.

Makes sense... and made me feel a bit silly for asking for a chat... but it was him that suddenly came out with that statement! And then said we should have a sober chat about it. And you know, it got me thinking.... and crying pretty much every day since then. In the shower. Watching TV. Eating breakfast. I've managed to avoid crying out of the house and during chats on skype, but have caved on phone calls and am seriously crying all over the place at home.

I don't know what's come over me. It just all seems so close and real now I think is all. It's that there is no good option. I have two:

1. break up with Adam and go/stay in UK = makes me very sad (and also happy)
2. stay in NZ with Adam and miss family, friends, cat and life in general = makes me very sad (and also happy)

Am I allowed to swear? I feel it's warranted, honestly I do.

Fuck it.

Right, I shall be constructive again now! I have less than 3 weeks until I go to south america, so watch this space for it to get briefly intersting again, hopefully. I am nice and busy until then. Adam is taking me to parties and drinks and dinners and plays all over the place. I have my final jewellery and Maori courses next week, and have really enjoyed them. I've also made a friend - well two. My trainer, Evan, but he leaves for home (USA) in a couple of months. But also a girl called Fiona on the Maori course, and I really like her. She's the first friend I've met organically and I really like as well! So that's good news. The jewellery is going very well and photos should follow next week when it's all done.

Here are some more nice photos of Adam and me - I should preface by saying some of them were for a fancy dress party and I was cinderella, with him being prince charming!

(and also, a special thank you to Fernando today as I've been tearful and homesick all day and he managed to make me really smile and feel better! Thank you Mr Loizides! And dearest daddy, please get better at reading the signals that your daughter is on the verge of tears!!)